No Tears

Unbelievable but true - 3 events of bereavement within 5 months in the same year. Are they mere coincidence or am I just plain "unlucky" to have to face them? Although I remained very calm and didn't cry throughout all 3 occasions, such occurrences weren't without any toll on myself.

My weakness lies in my inability to express my emotion. I told myself "cry please... cry", but was in vain. God surely is currently putting me through the mother-of-all-tests. As a result of not being able to physically cry out, my appetite and sleeping pattern suffered greatly. For half a month I was only able to eat cat-sized meals, and unable to sleep more than 4 hours daily.

From L-sized to M-sized, sometimes S... transforming from Miss Energetic to Miss Drowsy. What a great way to turn slim, but that's beside the point. What I want is normalcy; I long to get back to those good old days and I wish to be able to move forward with continuous strength.

Now I know what the Queen-of-my-heart went through. It's tough-going to play so many roles at home for a 28 y.o. + still-healthy young woman, let alone a 63 y.o. with chronic conditions. Perhaps that's why God decides to take her back and let the 28 y.o. take over the noble duty instead.